One thing that's implied above is how much I want someone to be living in THEIR onlyness, to have a pov, and clear values. That way, they *can* challenge me and hold me accountable.
FIND YOUR PEOPLE-I am actively in pursuit of this goal, knowing that it's not a linear process. It's letting go and letting in, stepping out of my comfort zone and into vulnerable spaces, engaging in new activities and ending ones that no longer serve me. I'm embracing my Onlyness, as it leads me to new possibilities, purpose, people, and passions.
BRAVA, to all of this. This list I came up with? It's hard won. I can literally point to the bruises on my heart of trying to change people who couldn't or wouldn't stand up for me, and realizing I needed to let go. Also learning to trust when there's as many life stories that says, it's too risky. So when I say I am rooting you on, I mean it down to my toes.
This following section cut life a healthy knife Nilofer. For a long time I have thought I was 'doing it alone' whereas reading this piece made me realise how rarely, still to this day, do I have others advocating for me, as in the whole, Onlyness of me. Indeed often, mostly, it gets suppressed and dimmed by others 'at work', yet my wife Jackie the past few days shared over dinner "she would never want me to self-censor nor be quiet about what I believe in." We have not had so many deep conversations in recent years but they are happening more and more and in this moment I felt more seen and advocated for than at any other time, well, since you 'saw' me in 2017 on a walk n talk. #thankyou x
"I wonder if that’s the same for you. Did it take years because you did it alone? I say that even if you talked it through with someone. Because if who you’re talking with can’t or won’t advocate for you and with you, you might as well be alone.
And that’s the lesson for all of us being told bullshit: FIND YOUR PEOPLE."
What a beautiful think Jackie said to you. In chapter four of PoOnlyness, I write about how sometimes the people are right nearby, but they can't join you, because you've not shown up yourself. It's a double helix. You and Yours.
One thing that's implied above is how much I want someone to be living in THEIR onlyness, to have a pov, and clear values. That way, they *can* challenge me and hold me accountable.
FIND YOUR PEOPLE-I am actively in pursuit of this goal, knowing that it's not a linear process. It's letting go and letting in, stepping out of my comfort zone and into vulnerable spaces, engaging in new activities and ending ones that no longer serve me. I'm embracing my Onlyness, as it leads me to new possibilities, purpose, people, and passions.
BRAVA, to all of this. This list I came up with? It's hard won. I can literally point to the bruises on my heart of trying to change people who couldn't or wouldn't stand up for me, and realizing I needed to let go. Also learning to trust when there's as many life stories that says, it's too risky. So when I say I am rooting you on, I mean it down to my toes.
This following section cut life a healthy knife Nilofer. For a long time I have thought I was 'doing it alone' whereas reading this piece made me realise how rarely, still to this day, do I have others advocating for me, as in the whole, Onlyness of me. Indeed often, mostly, it gets suppressed and dimmed by others 'at work', yet my wife Jackie the past few days shared over dinner "she would never want me to self-censor nor be quiet about what I believe in." We have not had so many deep conversations in recent years but they are happening more and more and in this moment I felt more seen and advocated for than at any other time, well, since you 'saw' me in 2017 on a walk n talk. #thankyou x
"I wonder if that’s the same for you. Did it take years because you did it alone? I say that even if you talked it through with someone. Because if who you’re talking with can’t or won’t advocate for you and with you, you might as well be alone.
And that’s the lesson for all of us being told bullshit: FIND YOUR PEOPLE."
What a beautiful think Jackie said to you. In chapter four of PoOnlyness, I write about how sometimes the people are right nearby, but they can't join you, because you've not shown up yourself. It's a double helix. You and Yours.
I so need to dive back into the Book Nilofer .. its in my small pile - thanks for this prompt, very profound